The striving devotee ought also to adopt a neutral attitude toward life; not callous indifference, but rather, as Paramahansaji has said, "Instead of cultivating endless desires, which do not always bring happiness, think of life in this way: 'Lord, you have put me in this body. I didn't ask to be born. It is You who are dreaming my existence.'" In other words, realize that you, and all other forms of life, are but condensed or materialized thoughts of God. All that we are, all that we have, belongs to Him; of ourselves we are nothing. In Him, we have everything; in Him, we are everything. In that consciousness let us perform good works, let us enjoy the good fruits of this life.
And from page 45 in the same book:
Be an example of what you want others to be...change yourself! That is the best way to change those around you. It is hard to do, but it can be done. One's effort should be directed toward making himself a person who is respected and looked up to; whose word carries weight.
And from page 46:
So long as you show nervousness and tension around your husband or wife or children, they will react and behave in a similar way. It can't be otherwise. So if you want a different atmosphere in your home, you have to take the initiative. Do not expect an overnight change in your family. That seldom happens; change is a slow, natural process. And even if it never comes, do not be discouraged or overly concerned. Guruji used to say to us, "God gave every human being a blessed gift: the privacy of his own thoughts. Therein he can live and silently create a companionship and understanding with God that will gradually begin to reflect on his entire life -- including his relationships with his family, his community, his world." Even if those around you do not change perceptibly, the change that is wrought within yourself makes you less vulnerable to the misbehavior of others.
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